Ben: (earnestly) Gays are bad!
Sarah and Kathy: (simultaneously shocked) What?!
Ben: (defiantly) You heard me, gay are bad!
Sarah: (surprised) How could you possibly say that?
Ben: (matter of fact) Because it’s true, gay guys are bad! But um… lesbians on the other hand…
Chris: (getting into the topic excitedly) Oh yeah, lesbians are awesome! Wouldn’t you rather see two naked girls instead of one?
Sarah: (raises an eyebrow questionably) Not really. (She glances at Kathy and shakes her head as if disappointed in Chris.)
(Ben gives Chris a high-five; the action is reciprocated to Mike and Nick.)
Chris: Oh yeah, man! (He lets out a supposedly manly grunt, grunt)
Nick: (at Kathy) Wouldn’t you rather see two guys together?
Kathy: (truthfully) Well, I do admit that two guys are better than two girls.
Ben: (defiantly) That’s because you’re straight!
Kathy: (defending herself) But I don’t carry this double standard. I would never say that lesbians are bad. How can you guys think like this?
Ben: Because gays are bad!
Kathy: (unwilling to give up) Is gayness genetic or is it a choice?
Ben: (expertly or so he thinks) Of course it’s not genetic. I’m not gay because my parents aren’t gay, and my kids won’t be gay either because I’m not! Gayness is not hereditary!
Sarah: (rephrasing Kathy’s thoughts) Of course you can’t inherit gayness, but that’s doesn’t mean it’s a choice. There’s a gene that determines whether someone is gay or not, and that gene may not necessarily come from the parents.
Ben: (defensively) Yeah, so where’s it supposed to come from?
Mike: (giving in) Well genetic mutations do come from the environment, and everybody has mutations.
Sarah: (triumphantly) See, ha! Why would anybody choose to be gay? It goes against to many people like you out there, and it would make their life a living hell!
Ben: They would choose to be gay because they are!
Kathy: (feeling a victory coming on) That’s exactly what I meant, it’s in their genes!
Ben: Gayness is a disease. Let’s ask someone else. (To Heather) Hey Heather, you tall girl over there. Can you inherit gayness?
Sarah: (annoyed) You can’t ask the question like that. You have to rephrase it to “Is there a gay gene?”
Chris: (defending his friend) Ben can ask the question however he wants to because he’s not gay!
(More high-fives between Ben, Chris, Nick, and Mike.)
Kathy: (more annoyed than Sarah) Fine, Heather what do you think?
(While everyone is anticipating a response, Heather ducks down into the chair, plugs up her ears, and shakes her head.)
Heather: I’m not talking about this, not now, not with you people.
Chris: (not willing to give up) Let’s ask Len, cuz he’s the man!
Ben: (agreeing) Yeah. Yo, Len, what are you listening to?”
Len: (taking off headphones) Huh?
Chris: (teasing him) That’s Korn right?
Ben: (getting to the point) What do you think about gays?
Len: Why are you talking about this? It’s just wrong!
(More high-fives between Mike, Nick, Ben, Chris, and Len gets a piece of the action this time around.)
Nick: (trying to sound cool) You are THE man!
Len: But you know, lesbians… That’s another story altogether.
Sarah and Kathy: (defeated) Oh my God.
Ben: See, ha! (To teacher number one) Yo, in the front, Mr. *****!
Teacher number one: (not exactly wanting to partake in this discussion. But he waves to Sarah and Kathy, cocks his head and with his eyes asks “are you okay?” Sarah and Kathy both shakes their heads. Then teacher number one to Ben) What do you want?
Ben: What do YOU think about gays?
Teacher number one: (pause, pause) I’m not saying anything.
Chris: Because he knows we’re right!